YOU are my Joy.

I am going to miss my loft. I really like it here. I like the brick, the stone floors, my messy room; the feeling of ownership and the satisfaction I get from cleaning it; how I can leave 15 minutes before class and only be a few minutes late if parking is crazy like usual; my bookshelf inside the wall; how annoying the dryer is and the 1.5 feet of space between the ceiling and my room's outer wall that forces me to hear absolutely everything outside of it; the one large window and source of natural light; the scary ledge outside that Paige and I somehow managed to "sneak" onto & sit on in the middle of the night; how people throw incredible things such as dog doodoo out their windows (and also let their dogs urinate in the elevators and leave it for the janitor); the times when some one pulls the fire alarm for the heck of it and I'm the only one to evacuate; how I can walk across the street and observe and talk to people from several diverse parts of the world while buying fresh produce, honey, homemade bread, and flowers; I will miss unlocking my bike from the railing right outside the door, taking it with me down the elevator, and prayerfully riding through downtown, observing and praying for the souls I see.

I have learned so much here. I have begun to learn faithful, selfless love. I have learned how to be on time when absolutely necessary (maybe even a little early ;)). I have become more disciplined, been faithful to my job, learned how to balance my schedule- at least better than before. I have become burdened to pray. In each of these aspects, I am not fully mature, but I have matured in my thinking and in the way I walk through and spend my days. The Lord has brought me to a place of contentment. Sometimes it feels as if it is TOTAL contentment; other times my desires bubble up and I dream and dream. Not that it is wrong to dream, but too much dreaming often leads me to want them more than trust the plans the Lord has for me. I truly trust Him. I pray He will continue perfecting me so that I may trust in Him fully EVERY MOMENT and be completely satisfied in satisfying Him for ever. I know in the past I have not been okay just me and him. Not in the depths of my heart. I am almost there. I am there a lot of the time. I want to be there every moment, regardless of what He gives or takes away.

I have been living beneath His wing- in his blessing. And now as He did for the Israelites, He is moving the cloud by day and the fire by night to my earthly father's house and I will follow Him. I do NOT want to be anywhere but with Him and in His will! I am excited to live with my dad, anyway. I have not lived with him since I was 4. And I of course do not remember that. I hardly remember anything of my dad in the house before the day he was no longer. Now I get to enter his house rejoicing! Healed! Restored! It's crazy that every one in my family is moving at the same time, too. I guess it's time for New Beginnings.

Lord, You are sovereign, wise, the PERFECT father. I love you and I am sssooooo excited to continue walking hand-in-hand with you every day! YOU are my Joy :)